When Women Gather

It doesn’t always happen this way but when the sun, moon and stars line up and you have a talented connector of people, magic can happen.

A bunch of magic happened in early May when more than 60 women between the ages of 50 and 80ish gathered in Bristol, RI for the first annual Quest celebration, spearheaded by the incredible people connector, Diana Dunbar Place. Diana established the 333 Collective a few years ago to build a community of third act women. Her hope was to create a space where like minded women, over the age of 50, could come to share their stories and journeys into their second, third and fourth acts. I joined early, rather reluctantly, after the disappointment of joining and quitting more than one group that purported to connect, inspire and offer support to women in my age group, but didn’t.

My reluctance disappeared as I settled into almost three years of enjoying all the 333 Collective has to offer. This happened during Covid, so we had the luxury of connecting with each other through regular Zoom meetings. The women I met through Zoom were from around the globe and each one had something special to share in the way of inspiration. This quickly led to the design of sharing and networking gatherings led by one or more of the members, offering regular Zoom meetings where they share their passions and talents. To give you an idea some of the groups include; Travel, Designing your Third Act, EFT Tapping, Writers Group and Wellness to name a few. I will be leading a Film Club starting in the fall and I look forward to connecting with other film lovers and chatting about the films we will watch.

What has been most remarkable is the caliber of the women who have found their way to the Collective. They are, as you can imagine, very different from one another, but also very much the same as far as their extreme curiosity and zest for life goes. Each woman sees the endless possibilities ahead of her, no matter what her age. They look for change and they embrace it when it arrives on their doorstep. Being in their presence and learning about their unique experiences in life has been very inspirational.

There is nothing more powerful than finding your tribe and having the experience of growth within a new environment. If that sounds too corny or too “woo-woo” it’s not.

As I look back on my experiences with friendships over seven decades I know many of my closest friendships were based on what I was doing at a specific point in time. I suppose that is true for most people. When our children are young we befriend other mothers we meet through school activities. When we enter the workforce we manage to find those work friends that make work tolerable on difficult days. If you are a person who has always lived in the same town (not me) all your life you probably have friends from childhood. Since I moved so often as a child and as an adult, with a number of “careers” under my belt, I had the good fortune to gather many remarkable female friends over time. I found that the list would change as I continued to grow. My friend lists have been culled many times over the years but a small number of close friends stay on that list no matter where they may live. You know, the ones you haven’t seen in a long time, but if you pick up the phone your conversation will start up where you last left off.

For me, leaving a more than two decades long career 8 years ago caused the most recent culling of the list. I don’t mean that in a negative way but rather the natural process that occurs when you leave a group of people you worked with every day, the people who became your work friends.

I find I seem to hold on to one or two key people from each part of my life and the rest become fond memories or yearly Christmas card friends. Is it that as we get older we want deeper connections with fewer people? I think so. What I know for sure is that women need other female friends. Not acquaintances but real friends that are interested in what you are doing and offer inspiration and support. I think this must be reciprocal in order to offer deep and long-lasting connections.

Becoming an filmmaker thrust me into a new realm of possibilities on the friendship front. Making films about older women led me to a group of women I probably would never have met. Add to that the connections I have made within the 333 Collective and my list has changed and become so rich. That’s a pretty exciting place to be in my 70’s.

When women gather magic happens. There was definitely magic in the air during the 333 Collective two day event earlier this month in Rhode Island. To be able to meet face to face with women you have been Zooming with for a long time is pretty darn magical. This group of women is unique in their quest for more. Their willingness to share their experiences and areas of expertise in a way that helps others is remarkable. I drove away from the event changed, in a good way. I heard from many of the women that they felt the same way.

When women gather there is an electricity that builds and it is something to behold. I hope your list is electric.

Stay curious!

Peace and Love,

Melissa